“I’m a survivor of a chaotic home,
a family who didn’t know how to show love, a
house that wasn’t safe. I survived because one day I knew I couldn’t stay there anymore and fled. I was still living in the Women’s Aid Refuge when I heard about the WMTG traineeship. It sounded great, an amazing opportunity but I didn’t think they would want me. Why would they? But I went along to Discovery Day hiding my fears, hiding that I’d been sick that morning with nerves, pretending I was the best and could do everything when inside I was screaming “I can’t”. I was so happy when they phoned and said I’d been picked for the traineeship. I couldn’t remember a time when I felt so happy.

Launchpad and Outward-Bound weeks were hard and tested everyone’s comfort zones. The team tried to show that I needed to be more positive and have an open mind to new stuff. My head was all over the place. I hit out. I cried. I probably wasn’t very nice. But still they supported me, helped me move out of the refuge and into my own home, spent time with me, played cards with me, encouraged me to eat and took me to my GP appointments so I didn’t run out of medication. Slowly I began to trust them all.

My coach, Ros, helped me grow in confidence and become more open minded and self-aware. Coaching was not easy but she wouldn’t let me give up. I seemed to do well in my work placements and I loved making new friends in the group and at placements. But it was hard – why should I deserve all this praise and good stuff that was coming my way? I wasn’t worth that. Slowly, with lots of tears, lots of coaching, and the amazing Paula who mentored me I started to believe I was worth it. I learnt not to give up. I learnt to accept their help and I have learnt that there are people who care.

My last placement was amazing, it was physical work in a warehouse for PGL and they all wanted me to do so well. That gave me the confidence to apply to PGL as a trainee instructor. I wanted to do something physical and I wanted to give back – to help young people who like me had got a bit a lost. When I told our ‘Big Sister’, Laura, I had the job she just jumped up and down and screamed. Everyone was so pleased for me, so proud of me. It was a bit shocking because I actually, felt proud of myself.”